| I Love Mondays! |
| Summary: | Another wonderful Monday for Bob, The HYDRA AGENT! |
| Date: | (2016-08-29) |
| Related: | http://marvelreborn.wikidot.com/log:2016-08-26-pie-the-other-white-meat |
| NPCs: | Various Middle Management of HYDRA's white collar division. |
| Scene Runner: | NA |
| Social/Plot: | Social |
| Players: |
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* Secret HYDRA Lair – Monday Morning 7:55 am *
Deep below the surface of New York hidden far from the eyes of regular men is a place so fearsome, so terrifying it can only be a HYDRA command bunker. Or rather a small remnant faction of the once mighty hydra in an old underground office building of sorts.
Outside the windows there's no view at all just the rocks from where a long time back the building had collapsed and simply been paved over forgotten to time and the world above. Large banners hang over the majority of windows, and men walk their way about the cubicles as low ranking members of HYDRA do the most vile and villainous thing imaginable: Credit card fraud. Funding had been lax following the death of Strucker and the subsequent fall from grace of HYDRA splintered into warring sub factions, but they were chugging along trying their best to make one quota after the next still taking time out of the busy schedule to occasionally send out raiding parties for terrorist activities.
The incandescent lights of the building flicker slightly as janitors in HYDRA jumpsuits climb their way up ladders to change out the old and bring in the new. Even if this wasn't the nicest place to work, they did still have a water cooler, and the torture dungeons further bellow the facility. Still progress was being made steadily.
As the doors of the elevator back to the surface slide open, Bob along with a number of other men in HYDRA uniforms steps his way out into the flickering lights of this management nightmare. As he walks he whistles making his way with a spring in his step and a briefcase in hand. This place was home. "Lovely day to Hail HYDRA isn't it Phil?" He offered passing by one of his co-workers being dragged out of his cubical for 'reprogramming' not letting it phase him a moment as he gives a quick HAIL HYDRA to the officer conducting the reprogramming.
He makes his way over to the back of the room to a small grey cubical. The desk is covered in knickknacks and photographs of Bob at his various jobs. Each and every photograph even the company pick-nick seems to have people solely dressed in those HYDRA uniforms. Bob takes his seat behind the grey cubical desk his early 2000's computer monitor beaming back at him as he flicks open his briefcase. It was just another day at the office.
Mark, the sub-supervisor of personnel and project monitoring, adjusts his tie. It's formal Monday and he was wearing a Perry-winkle-blue to offset the lime green of his jumpsuit. He grabs a huge manila folder seven inches thick, tucks it under his arm and leaves his corner window office. He makes a casual B-line straight to bob's desk, smiling and gently saying "Hail Hydra!" in greeting to his fellow subordinates. Upon reaching Bob's desk he leans over the cubical and not-so-gently drops the folder on Bob's “In-tray”, nearly tripling the stack there. "New A-mex numbers. I trust you can get through that by… say.., Wednesday. Carol called in sick."
Not long after there's yet another HYDRA man walking on over to Bob's desk (or more accurately, pseudo-dancing while quietly singing along to a Britney Spears song only he can hear.) A moment later and -another- over-stuffed folder is unceremoniously dropped onto Bob's desk, causing the various trinkets to jump slightly from the resulting shockwave.
"Hey heeey, everyone look alive, Agent Ted's on the scene," he announces as if everyone in the building should know exactly who he is. "Hail HYDRA, et al. Now let's get 'er done!" he further 'encourages' with a sweeping motion of a fist at waist-height. "Or rather, -you- get 'er done while I deal with more important matters," he immediately corrects while first pointing at Bob, then thumbing back to himself.
He's beaming with so much self-importance it's a small miracle he hasn't blinded someone yet.
At the mention of Hail Hydra seemingly everyone on the floor including the now tied up Phil stops and stands to recite "Hail, Hydra! Immortal Hydra! We shall never be destroyed! Cut off a limb, and two more shall take its place! We serve none but the Master as the world shall soon serve us! Hail Hydra!"
Of course Bob is seemingly the only one not wearing his Tie as he stands up quoting with the rest of the men on the office floor in unison before falling back down into his seat. He looks up towards Mark for a moment with a friendly smile about to speak before Ted silences that train of thought and Bob gets to taking his equipment out of the briefcase in order to get ready for the day. Spare pens and pencils? Check. Today's Passcodes? Check. 250 rounds of pistol ammunition? Check. Cyanide capsules? Check. HYDRA field manual on how to properly take a punch from a superhuman? Check. Tie? Ch- uh… Bob looks round his briefcase for a moment.
"I'll get right on it, don't worry." Bob states confidently hoping in the back of his mind they don't notice, from behind those bright yellow plastic lenses of his mask. There's a forced smile that comes across his face as he starts to boot up his Vista machine proper.
"Um, Bob.." He takes a deep breath and grabs Bob's already made mug of coffee, "There is something I and agent Ted to need to talk to you about for a minute…" He takes a casual whiff of the mug and his eyes light up. After a sip he raises the mug in a salute as if to say the creamer balance is exceptional. He positions the mug in front of his sternum, "There has been a talk from upper management… See… Nothing formal yet. But there are concerns that you are… distracted in your work… Um, Ted?"
For a long moment Agent Ted simply stands there, as if expecting something, anything at all. Recognition? A 'yes, sir?' Who the hell knows? Though when he's ready to reveal his next moment of brilliance to all of the lesser agents around himself it starts with nothing more than two white earbuds simultaneously popping out of his ears when his left hand gives the wire a subtle but firm tug at chest height.
He's -staring- at Bob. A blank, red, goggle-eyed stare.
"Where's your tie?"
As if further pushing the point home his one raised hand lowers in a way which smooooothes out the lovely blue silk scarf he's chosen for today, radiating almost half as much as his ego does.
Mark's train of thought helps to get Ted's own brain back into gear, quickly clearing his throat in a none-too-subtle way. He uses the moment as an excuse to smooth out his lovely, lovely tie one more time. "Ah, yes. Unfocused," he trails off while reaching out to take one of the knick-knacks off of Bob's desk without any sense of asking for permission, squinting his goggle-shielded eyes as he examines it closer. "As you are well aware under chapter forty-seven section one-nineteen sub-paragraph eight we are strictly limited to -five- personal effects within the workspace environment, and I'm counting…" he trails off, voice just higher than a whisper as he starts pointing and counting the various pieces, "a few too many."
The 'borrowed' item is set back down, then he adds "Oh, and there's also the little mishap from the diner the other day" as if it's not a big deal. Certainly no bigger of a deal than having too many personal items!
Mark takes another sip of Bob's coffee, "Yeah! Chapter 14, section 12 of the employee handbook states ‘No unauthorized public statements or demonstrations shall be made without HR or PR's approval.’" He pauses for dramatic effect, "And while we do appreciate your enthusiasm in this weekend's event, your post failed to generate any noteworthy… shall we say, positive publicity?" He looks at ted, and then looks back to Bob, "We are not exactly upset about it. But it does cause some concern. I checked your file this morning and you don't seem to have authorization PR 22284.2" He looks at Bobs chest, "DO you have authorization PR 22284.2?"
"Th-that's my coffee." Bob starts off before his cup is sipped from and soiled ruining the sanctity of a cup he'd spent all morning working to prepare. "My tie i-" He cuts himself off as his priceless family miniature stapler is taken off his desk. This causes him to change thought trains. "That's my stapler I need that f-" He falls back silent as he's told again about the company policy.
Even as the two talk about his tie he looks back from one to the other and then to the clock and finally the massive stack of work that'll likely take him two shifts of overtime to get through on schedule. He stumbles for a moment over his own words thinking trying to say something. "The paperwork I-"
"Bob… Bob… Focus." Mark says gently. "Ted?"
"Yeah," Ted seconds. "Showed some real out-of-work enthusiasm. But..you know. Regulations."
Bob's quiet protest about paperwork causes Ted's expression to change, almost lighting up. "Oh, that reminds me. Agent Ron had some stuff waiting for you, too."
Here he motions like he's going to drink from a cup of coffee as well but quickly changes tactic to smoothing out his tie -again.- He doesn't actually have a coffee cup with him, a fact which leaves him casting a longing glance at the mug in Mark's hand.
"Listen," he then lowers his voice and leans over the cubicle wall a bit further as though sharing top-level Intel. "We're just tryin' to look out for ya, buddy. These things..they tend to rub the higher-ups the wrong way."
Noticing the gesture, Mark hands Ted -Bob's- cup of coffee. "Oh this is really good."
"I understand, and I'm making my quota's it's j-" Then Bob stops seeing his perfect cup of coffee being passed around him, being suddenly cut off from the thought as his briefcase is still open to one side. He just nods his head and tries to force a smile instead, though on the inside he really wants him some of that coffee he spent hours perfecting.
"Hey Bob, got some more work for you." One of the other agents, Jack mentions with a smile as he dumps another stack of folders onto the end box sending it even higher than before followed by two more men in HYDRA jumpsuits who all seem to be wearing different ties. "Yeah we need these done by five o'clock sharp, and congrats on the 5 year employee milestone, we meant to save you some cake but." The second man cuts in. "It was just too good, your wife did a real great job making it." Even as he to sets a stack of paperwork up for bob to finish. They actually ate Bob’s cake before the workday began.
Ted happily accepts the offered coffee and samples it for himself, already making a pleased sound from around the mug before he's done gulping some of it down. "No wonder you're always so happy to show up for work. Should start having -you- make the coffee around here. What do you think, Mark? Time for a change of guard in the break room?"
Jumping back to his previous thought without any delay, he says "Oh hey, and speaking of the higher ups…" Here he pulls out his phone, pausing his music then poking and swiping at the screen. "This has been goin' around the upper levels this week, check it out."
When he turns the phone around for Bob to see what he's talking about there's a picture filling the screen of Madame Hydra's backside, clearly taken on the sly and without any real time to get a proper angle.
Who cares if Ted's already a devoted husband. It's -Madame Hydra's butt!-
"I sure wouldn't mind takin' a ride on the ol' Emerald Caboose, know what I'm sayin?'"
He leaves that memorable thought in the air while drinking some more of Bob's coffee. It's followed by a bemused scoff, staring at the ever-growing pile of paperwork. "Glad this isn't my desk," he not-so-subtly declares.
Mark takes a breath, "This going to bother me… I understand Formal Monday's are 'voluntary' but it really helps show your team spirit." He holds up his hands, "Janet! Can you get the spare tie for Agent Bob here… He seems to have misplaced his." Janet, wearing a red flowery tie, appears almost out of nowhere to hand bob a green raggedy "Lucky the Care Bear" tie that survived the 1980's. It was faded and almost yellow. Mark looks at Bob's desk, "Yeah, we were asked to increase your workload just a little bit. And take advantage of all that wonderful enthusiasm and… Initiative you've demonstrated… and channel it… Into something more… Productive."
"Keep this up and you may be looking at a management position someday, buddy!" Ted exclaims then reaches out to (quite roughly) give Bob a good ol' slap across the back of a shoulder. "Everyone around the office has noticed that enthusiasm of yours." (And have been offloading as much work onto Bob as they can get away with.) "It's really been improving morale around here!" (Because said people now have less work to do on account of leaving it all upon Bob's desk.)
Bob props his elbows on his desk and grips the sides of his head in a brief moment of despair as he looks over the mountain of paperwork.
Mark motions to the cell phone and takes a long hard look at Madam Hydra. "You know, I'm glad she is coming back." He says with a grin. "But um, yea, might not want to let HR know you have that Ted." He turns and leans an elbow over the cubicle, "So how is the wife and kids Ted?"
Bob still with his head propped up looks at the pile of paperwork as if just looking at it will make it go away. There's something a bit less glamorous to this whole HYDRA thing then one might think from the pamphlets and the guidebooks, and recruitment posters but it's all worth it for the benefits and that steady paycheck. Sure there isn't much in the way of Hazard pay, but it's still safer than some of the teams he's worked for.
Ted's response to Mark is just a moment behind schedule due to him emptying the last of Bob's coffee in one very content sip. "They're all doin' great!" comes the official, and way too cheery, reply, glad to have the focus back upon him and how amazing his life is once again. Where it belongs! "We're looking at a trip out to Hawaii to celebrate Angie's sixteenth then we're going to scout around for a nicer part of town to move to. All of this money doesn't spend itself, right?" he rhetorically asks with a beaming grin.
Once more he invades the personal space that is Bob's Cubicle to set the completely drained mug down, on top of the mountain of paperwork since it's easier for Ted to reach. It also marks the one folder with what is destined to become a lovely coffee-ring stain. "Hey, how's your face doing, anyway?" he then asks Bob. "That was one heck of a hit you took. And speaking of YouTube hits… here's nine-hundred and forty," he announces while calling up the video to play on his phone.
Again.
There's a halfhearted laugh and a smile as he tries to make it seem like it's all right. "Hey, still just as funny the thirty fourth time am I right?" He takes the coffee mug with the words 'Worlds 543rd Best Husband' on the side , and sets it back down on its coaster, finally taking the tie from the lovely HYDRA woman in order to put it on. Even if the tie happens to be vastly uncomfortable.
On the outside he's laughing and smiling even as he watches himself slam to the floor with the hilarious looping replay someone had remixed out of it. Even as he makes his move to start filling out those documents, since credit card fraud doesn't commit itself these days. "Just glad to be a team player guys."
Mark cheers up, "That's what I love to hear! I appreciate all your hard work and enthusiasm Bob. I really do!" He turns back and leans over into the cubicle, "Just keep focused and you should do well. We can discuss this further in your quarterly performance review in October." He paused for a moment then looks at his watch, "Oh Ted, which reminds me. We have End-Of-Month coming up! We are going to need extra hands this weekend. Think you can help out?"
Ted makes an exaggerated look of concern to Mark's question. "Ooo..no can do on the E.O.M, already got tickets to the game that day."
Pause.
Once more Ted turns to Bob, his frown now looking more thoughtful in nature. "Hey Bob, you're a real people-person." Said right after watching the video of the guy getting punched clear out of city limits for not being a people-person. "That sounds like it'd be right up your alley. Whatcha think, Mark? Why, I can't think of a better person for the job."
Before Bob can respond, "Yeah Bob. That would be great! You are one of our fastest two finger typists! You can get that done with us in no time! I appreciate you help!" He leans all the way into the cubicle and pats Bob on the shoulder, "I really appreciate it. Six A.M Sharp! We will provide lunch." He motions at Ted to walk back to his office, "And that's Saturday… And… Sunday, Bob! Hail HYDRA!"
Bob goes right to work doing his data entry like a pro. It's one of his few legally acceptable skills, and seeing how well he does it can potentially make this stack of paper vanish before he has to come back in for work. "Well I was actually looking at taking my wife out for our aniv-" Except then he's interrupted.
At the call for a hail HYDRA Bob, and the rest of the floor of workers jump back up to attention dropping what they're doing so that they can salute to the flags hung at the far end of the office. "Hail, Hydra! Immortal Hydra! We shall never be destroyed! Cut off a limb, and two more shall take its place! We serve none but the Master as the world shall soon serve us! Hail Hydra!"
Ted promptly follows up with a "Hail HYDRA!" As his arms start to come back down he quickly brings his left hand closer, sliding the sleeve back to look at a FitBit which had been concealed beneath. "Whup! Gotta get those steps in back to the office. You da man, Bob!" he announces while pointing Bob's way with dual pistol-hands.